Today, I am an Oregonian.
I was standing at 39th and Hawthorne (still firmly planted in the Cesar Chavez Boulevard boycott) waiting to cross the street when a black Jetta Hatchback Thing whipped around from my right making a U-turn and almost plowed me over. The first reaction to such situations, as so eloquently and accurately put by Dane Cook, is Umm, hiii? then once I realized what was happening, Who the hell makes U-turns in this town?! Probably a jerk from California. He (barely) cleared the sidewalk and (thankfully) did not mow me down and the precise (PRECISE) moment after I cursed him in my mind he sped away to reveal his California license plate on the tail of his Hatchback Thing.
Ha!
Because any Californian who has driven in Oregon knows the U-turn laws are the exact opposite of each other. Well, they should know. This a-hole sure didn't. In the big C-A, U-turns are permitted unless otherwise posted. In the big O, U-turns are not permitted unless otherwise posted. It's probably because the streets are so narrow and people almost get plowed down by a-holes from California who don't know the rules.
But really, I'm no big supporter of Oregon driving, either. The speed limit is 40? I'll go 25 then. What's the rush? Um, I'm in a rush because I have since become late after leaving my house on time because none of you drive the speed limit. They must not have anywhere to be.
At any rate, I about pissed myself when my snap judgment about crazy U-turning Californians instantly turned out to be true. This might be one of those "our brains figure out the answers to questions before our consciousness is aware of it" kind of things.
Were you always a curmudgeon? Or was it a learned behavior? If so, did you learn it from me? I'd be so proud.
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