Momma Says: Who IS this man?! I, Too, Have No Idea

Within six months, my brother went from

living alone in a shoebox struggling for work, wondering what to do with himself between sporadic stints at an ailing business, going so far as to solicit himself to complete strangers, including knocking on doors to sell himself to prostitution (okay that last part is a lie), to

getting spontaneously engaged, married 37 days later, interviewing for and scoring a new job in six days, working 115-hour weeks, barely having enough time to sleep let alone eat, wondering how his life has changed simultaneously so awesomely and so rapidly, and then, the piece de resistance: getting a HOUSE so he can FINALLY move his family here after MONTHS of working his patootie off.  (NONE of this part is a lie.)

But, you must know this is not just any house.  This house has a (really big) yard.  And a garage.  And an island in the kitchen, the size of a real island.  And a chicken coop.  And chickens!  Well, not yet, but there will be.  This house is a grown up house.  This can only mean my brother is a grown up.

Or, he is an alien inhabiting my brother's body and masquerading as a very convincing grown up.

Either way, there is still a house involved where I get to go on Saturday mornings and drink coffee, eat breakfast, and shoot the proverbial shizite.

So the house is basically the most gorgeous thing I've ever seen, aside from a few other things: Fort Youngstown (of course), my freshly-birthed nephew, and Jesus coming down from the clouds on a particularly mystical summer day last year.  Well, it felt like Jesus, but it could've been someone else I suppose.

Brother and I went out to la Casa de Byrom on Saturday where he signed papers and picked up the keys.  Then the two of us, unable to peel our jaws from the floor or wipe the look of pure childlike elation from our faces, spent the afternoon running between all the rooms, figuring out precisely how many jokes we could make about his "big deck," drinking coffee, planning a wedding party, and taking photos of every conceivable crook and nanny.

Thus, what follows: a [virtual] tour of the [gigantic] abode.

Front door

WOMP.  Living room/entry way

Kitchen

(Brother really liked the kitchen.)

Dining room, to the deck

"So, how big is your deck?"

"Big decks are the only kind of decks."

"A friend of mine has a small deck, but it just doesn't get the job done."

(He really liked the deck, too.)

Come to think of it, he really liked

the master bedroom

the huge living area with fancy heater fireplace

the dining room with french doors

and the hallway.

Brother also especially adored

the Grey Room

the Yellow Room

the two-car garage

and the backyard.

Needless to say, the jacuzzi tub

Dish washer

Stackable laundry

 

and chicken coop are all just icing on the cake.  

The enormous, enormous cake.

HOORAH!